It’s hard being a friend to someone when they’re dating a douchebag.
Not to say it’s a task for me to be someone’s friend (‘cuz if you’ve met any of my friends you’d find that it’s actually quite the privilege). It’s just hard to remain indifferent, and unbiased when you have an opinion and genuinely care.
You see old girl Aubrey in that video up there? I used to be that girl. OK, well not nearly as bad but I definitely wasn’t shy to make snide remarks when provoked. I think it’s safe to say that every group of girl friends will care if someone in their circle is being mistreated. There’s just always going to be that one friend who isn’t afraid to show it.
Don’t get it twisted, men care too. I have plenty of male friends who aren’t fond of their homies girlfriends, some who can barely even stand them. The only difference is, they just don’t say shit. At least not until after the relationship is over. Only then, will they drop the “I never really liked her anyway,” bomb. Men simply mind their own business.
Which is probably what women should do too. But it’s hard when you have to listen to your friends complain about a situation they can easily, physically take themselves out of (guilty!). I don’t mind listening, I’ll listen for a hundred lifetimes because that’s what friends do. It’s just that it really does hurt, to see a friend hurt. To see a strong woman look and feel so small next to their (in)significant other. To see a beautiful woman that just broke three necks in two blocks, allow someone else to make them feel ugly inside. How can you NOT let that affect you?
Usually, the best thing to do is just listen. Sigh deeply, snap your tongue, roll your eyes and neck, but just try to STFU lol. While we wish you’d learn from our mistakes, we know you have to learn on your own. Just know that we’re not “haters,” we really do want to see you happy. And the crying, the belittling, the manipulating, the blatant disrespect is NOT it.
Remember, we not only go by what we see but also by what YOU TELL US. One way to prevent us from thinking your man is a douchebag … is for him to stop acting like one.