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Wonderlost.

This is the part where you stop wondering what you did wrong. The part where you stop replaying the course of your relationship from beginning to end, wondering which exact moment he lost interest. It’s the part where you stop wondering why things didn’t work out. The part where you stop wondering how different things could’ve, would’ve, should’ve been. You stop wondering why.

This is the part where you wonder who’s falling asleep in his arms at night, and waking up next to him in the morning. It’s the part where you wonder if she cooks him breakfast or brings him pizza. This is the part where you wonder what he’s doing, and who he’s with. You wonder what they’re talking about, and how often she runs through his mind. It’s the part where you wonder what she did right. You start wondering who.

And then comes the part where you wonder if the pain will ever be over. The part where you wonder if you’ll ever stop feeling this way. It’s the part where you wonder if you’ll ever be able to watch a show, or attend a game, or sleep at night without thinking of him. The part where you wonder if you’ll ever feel this way about another person again. You wonder if you’ll always be alone. You wonder if you’ll ever get over him, or at the very least move on. This is the part where you wonder if you’ll ever feel wonderful again.

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