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Most Valuable Player.

originally drafted 05/2011. not sure why i never published it, but with the world series win i thought it was fitting to elaborate on and post now.

If you’re present in the room with me during a game – whether it be baseball or basketball, there’s no doubt you’ll hear the typical horny female banter amidst all the “And 1’s” and “Let’s go Giants!” I may be one of the boys when it comes to being a sports enthusiast, but let’s face it I’m still a girl. Seeing the determination in a pitchers eyes when the fate of the game rests upon him is a sight to behold and admire. It got me to thinking why some women are attracted to athletes to begin with.

I’ve dated two athletes in my lifetime, and after the last one it’s safe to say that I will do my best to abstain from them the remainder of my time here on Earth. It’s no secret, women are attracted to athletes. An athlete once asked me why. I think there are different reasons for different women.

First is the obvious – some of y’all are fine as FUCK. Many athletes are gorgeous Adonis’s seemingly carved out of stone. Granted, there are fine ass lawyers, doctors, teachers, FedEx drivers, garbage men, etc. etc. but when you’re an athlete your fly is constantly on display for the entire world to see. Furthermore, rigorous training and practices keep your physique in check even if your face isn’t.

Then, there’s the groupies. I remember being at Gravity during the Warriors “We Believe” season and seeing B. Diddy walk in. I looked away for literally one second, and when I looked back three snow-bunnies swooped up on him like the rent was due. For those who date athletes “professionally”, I’d have to say it’s the money, the cars, the clothes, the fame, and ultimately, the LIFESTYLE they’re attracted to. Fucking or fucking with an athlete is like an accomplishment to them.

But for women who don’t go seeking out athletes, but just so happen to end up with one, we don’t care about what you drive as long as you HAVE the drive. That is what I personally find attractive about athletes. I like knowing that there is something equally or more important than ME in their life (OMG did she just say that?). I swear you can see the depths of a mans soul when he’s in the zone. And while competitive sports are fueled by testosterone, it’s on the court or on the field where I see men cry the most. Whether it be because they lost a Superbowl, or because they won a World Series, I find it admirable. One can only hope they are just as passionate about other aspects in life … like you know, in the bedroom.

Unfortunately, along with determination and perseverance come “late night practices,” and “away games.” And with late night practices, and away games comes infidelity and lies. While I’m probably making an unfair generalization, it’s for those reasons (amongst others) I would never want to date an athlete ever again. Alas, we don’t pick and choose who we feel for. Just make sure the next athlete you fall for is an All-Star, treats you like their MVP, and knows that the relationship isn’t a game.

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