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Love Isn’t.

What is love? 

This is a popular question asked on Reel Street Love. It might also be one of the most popular questions asked in life. Ever. I’ve been dreading my turn in front of the camera with Rach, but know it’s inevitable unless I duck her for the rest of my life which obviously isn’t going to happen. She knows where I live, and I kind of love her.

So I’ve been watching other videos on the site in hopes that it would spark an answer from me. While all the responses were right and all very insightful, my mind still drew a blank. But I guess is what happens WHEN YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA.

I don’t really know what love is. That’s not a bitter answer, or even a cop-out answer either. I really have no clue, at least not one I can put into words. Everytime I think I know, something happens and I’m back at square one. I guarantee that if you ask me three more times, I’ll have three different answers.

I’m sorry. I don’t know what love is. But I know what love isn’t.

Love isn’t painful, or selfish, or insecure. It isn’t possessive, or conditional. It doesn’t make you feel little, and it doesn’t make you second-guess yourself. Love is not synonymous with crying, or fighting. And contrary to popular belief – LOVE DOES NOT MAKE YOU CRAZY. At least not the crazy kind of “crazy”. Just the good kind of crazy.

Everything else though? All that other shit? That is NOT love. Those are just a bunch of things people including myself – I lie, especially myself mistake for love and use as an excuse to justify being mistreated by the other personIf I didn’t love him, then I wouldn’t still be here right? She cheated on me and I still want to be with her, it must be love right? We fight all the time yet stay together because we love each other. RIIIGHT?

I was shamelessly watching an episode of The Jersey Shore one night with a man I used to date. As usual, Ronnie and Sammi were fighting and I yelled in exasperation, “Why the fuck are they even together?” He replied, “Because they love each other.” *SMH* No wonder we didn’t work out.

Damn, if that’s “love” then I don’t want to know the meaning of “hate.”

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