Originally written whenever Jozen posted that blog lol …
Reading Jozen’s post this morning reminded me of how I wanted to respond to the Wall Street Journal article myself, but not in its entirety. While I do agree with Kay Horowitz’s analysis of how men seem to be living an extended adolescence, like Jozen, I do not believe that being married and having children make a man any more of a man than the next single guy.
More than the article itself though, the title of Kay’s book is what resonated: Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men Into Boys. When I first read the profound statement, my estrogen screamed, “Nooooo that wasn’t supposed to happen!” It reminded me of this post from DEXintheCITY, to which my estrogen screamed, “Nooooo that’s not what I meant!” after reading.
I know this sounds like bullshit coming from a female whose blog is called Girls Are the New Boys, but like I said, it wasn’t meant to say that we are better or replacements. Just that we are more alike than we’d like to admit.
The homie Evan called me a “feminist” one day, to which I cringed. More power to ya, but that ain’t me. I know he meant well, but in my eyes the term has too many connotations that I do not associate myself with. I just don’t take myself that seriously.
Because I am independent, and strong. I guzzle down beer with the best of them and will beat you in Street Fighter (so what if I use cheater moves). But I still wanna be held, and feel protected. I want to be taken out to dinner, just as much as I want to cook my man a homemade meal. And I still want you to change my tire for me even though I already know how (and don’t worry, I’ll be on standby with a glass of lemonade ooh-ing and ahh-ing at how handy you are).
The point of making money, having our own car keys, paying a mortgage, and owning a rolodex of men just waiting for us to be free agents isn’t so that we can refuse chivalry. It’s for piece of mind. To know that we’re with you because we want you in our lives, and not because we need you there.
I hope this clarifies a few things and helps men understand the complex simplicity of some of us women. One of my objectives with this blog is to show men the method behind our madness in a way that doesn’t intimidate or embarrass them, so I hope I accomplish that.
Remember fellas; a real woman softens – not weakens her man. And a real man is secure enough to let her. Ladies, if you want to be treated like a woman – then allow your man, to be a man.