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Rather be Your N.I.G.G.A. – Throwback Thursday Post 02.22.11

Disclaimer: Yes, I will be using the N-word here. It’s verbatim and was necessary for this specific post. 

I was never into pet names, at least not the generic ones. “Babe” is the Antichrist to me, and I think the only time I’ve ever responded to, or called someone “baby,” was during sex, drunk, or during sex drunk. Any pet name I’ve ever given stemmed from an inside thing, and no, I’ve never used the same one twice and I hope you haven’t either. That shits just tacky, come on now.

I’ve been called a few names by the men I’ve dated (insert crude joke here). Some were cute (Topanga), some made me cringe (Lil’ Mama), and some made me think, “What the fuck?!” (nigga, dawg, blood). Again, WHAT THE FUCK? Granted, this was coming from someone who felt comfortable enough telling me about his father that passed away on the first date. The same person I spent countless hours talking baseball to during bar chants in between sloppy beer kisses. And the same guy that would constantly praise me for being so chill, like “one of the boys.” But I’m sorry, if your penis has ever been inside of me – I AM NOT YOUR NIGGA.

The thing is, I’m not at all offended by it. I honestly don’t think that was his intention either. And after a conversation I had with one of my girlfriends regarding the same issue with her and the guy she was seeing, we both came to the agreement that it’s actually a compliment. We get it. We’re so down to Earth and easy to get along with yada yada, that we’re like your homie. Except – we kiss, and snuggle, and hold hands, and have sex. So really, I’m not your dawg at all. Matter fact, I rather be called the other kind. Yes, the female one.

Because it’s not even necessarily disrespectful either. It’s just, well – weird.

Perhaps, this is a reflection of his views on me, and another reason I shouldn’t have dated him to begin with. ‘Cuz really, what kind of man calls the chick he’s wining, dining, and sexing, and taking on amusement park and museum dates to – his dawg or blood? Oh yeah, maybe the kind that just wants to be “niggas”.

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