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  • dearabi

Make Out of Luck

[For Q]

Since we was recently on the subject of “firsts,” I started thinking about another important one – my first kiss. It was with tongue. And it was horrendous lol. I was in the 6th grade and honestly, I remember wishing I was downstairs learning how to do the butterfly with the rest of my friends instead. Then, I thought about the first kiss I had with the boy who ended up being my first love – his breath smelled like how a Filipino house smells after u cook tuyo. Yah dude, I promise.

But then, I remembered one of the best kisses I ever had. The “situation” was bad, but the sex was good. Regardless, one thing was for sure – we were crazy about each other … at least in the beginning. I forget who, but one of us was laying down and the other walked over to plant a kiss. And I swear it was like those cartoons where sparks fly and trumpets sound off. It was so passionate yet so non-sexual. It’s hard to describe. But it was definitely amazing. To the point where mid-makeout sesh I started to feel my cheeks burn and eyes start watering up. I didn’t let any tears fall, but I noticed that when we had finally came up for air, his eyes were red as well. We both felt embarassed and didn’t question the others appearance nor feelings because we kinda just knew. Plus, I’m sure he felt just as gay as I felt lol.

And now I’m realizing … that the world, or at least me and my friends, or at least I – don’t make out enough. It used to be so fun. But I guess now … it’s just a mere prelude to sex that doesn’t last long enough. I’ll admit, I’m just as guilty as the next when it comes to it too. Like, ok can we just bang already? But when I really think about it, what’s the rush? It’s not like we’re in the elevator and only got 5 floors left to get in a quickie or I’m still living with my mom and she gets home in 20 minutes.

I’m a grown ass woman (most of the time at least lol). I got my own spot, and my own bed , and DAMMIT … I wanna be kissed like I’m 19, and in love, and still live with my mom whose about to be home in 20 minutes all. over. again.

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