>As you get older, you start to realize you’ve outgrown certain things. For me, they were Jose Cuervo, grillz, freak lines, fist fights just because someone stepped on your shoe, the “N-word,” twin beds, and most of all – hickeys. Thinking about it now, I wonder why on Earth I even condoned that type of behavior. Hickeys are ugly, pointless, and have the ability to get you in a lot of trouble if you’re still living under your parents roof.
I remember getting my first hickey and thinking I was sooo cool just because I had this big, purple bruise on my neck that had me wearing a turtleneck in 70 degree weather because I had short hair at the time and a mother who’d send my ass back to the Philippines if she even knew I knew what a hickey was! Yet, I continued to give and receive hickeys like they were some sort of right of passage.
During my junior year of high school, I vividly remember giving the guy I was seeing at the time a hickey on his stomach in the shape of an “A” (OMG, I’m almost too embarrassed to type). But tell me why I was so proud of myself? I’ll tell you why. Because “A” stands for adolescence, asshole, and A bitch didn’t know no better! You see, all a hickey is asides from an obnoxious way to tell the world “I’m taken,” is a BRUISE. Not a “love bite,” a BRUISE. Like the kind you get after being kicked in the shin so if you don’t want to get kicked in the shin, why would you want someone sucking on your neck for no apparent reason? (Twi-hards, you are not allowed to answer that question.)
I’m probably sounding real ancient right now by declaring my distaste for hickeys, but really? It’s not worth it. I promise. All the scarves in the summertime, the borrowing your older sisters foundation for cover up, the hassle of having to stick a spoon in the freezer in an attempt to get rid of something you just spent almost 5 minutes creating? Not that serious. Besides, there’s only so many times you can recycle that “I burned myself with the curling iron,” excuse before the parentals start to catch on. And by the time you get as “ancient” as me – you’ll soon realize there are so many better parts of the body to suck on (or be sucked on).
Yeah I said it lol.