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  • dearabi


I believe that most failures are a result of poor excuses.

Hate your job? There’s nothing else out there. Not following ur diet? It’s ok, I’m on vacation. Always broke? I deserved that LV purse. Barely passing this semester? Too much on my plate. And I, for one can and will make up any excuse NOT to go to the gym. But it’s too cold, too hot, too windy, too sunny, too far, too crowded, too early, too late, it’s Friday, it’s Tuesday – what if a plane explodes in the air and crash lands on top of Bally’s ???!!!

I understand shit happens, I really do. And on rare occasion, there is just no way around it. BUT regardless of how valid the excuse is, remember, an excuse is STILL just that – an excuse. And as long as we continue to use these excuses to justify our fucked up situations, we will continue to suffer just as long.

Relationships are not exempt.

In fact, they’re the biggest contributor to prolonged dysfunctional relationships. They’re the reason u stay with ur boyfriend even though it’s the 3rd Friday u’ve spent with mascara tears ‘cuz he broke ur date and didn’t bother calling. They’re the reason you stay with your girlfriend even though all ur boys dun told u she’s cheating on u and have it on camera. And they’re the reason why it was so hard for me to let go of nothing for the last 5 years of my life.

“He’s just really busy…” Even Obama makes time to take his wife out to dinner. “Oh, but he’s trying…” There is no such thing as “try,” just “do.” “It’s ok he just fucks those other girls but he LOVES me..” (Or any form of I’m his MAIN) Fuck being the “main,” u should be his ONLY. “It’s because his dad beat his mom when he was little…” There should NEVER be a reason a man should ever put his hands on woman.

I’ve heard and made every excuse in the book. And then I realized that nobody makes u do anything. How u are treated is how u allow the other person to treat u. Once u are willing to learn from ur mistakes and take responsibility for ur actions, then u stop making excuses. And when u stop making excuses u become more proactive and ultimately, a happier person.

I know we’re only human though, and sometimes we just can’t help ourselves. Because the fact of the matter is excuses are convenient and temporarily make us feel better for tolerating shit we know we don’t deserve. But when u really think about it, there should never be an excuse that can’t be eliminated by an action YOU take.

So the next time u try justify another persons hurtful actions by pointing to their family background, previous relationships, weekly schedule, etc. etc. point straight to urself instead. And remember – exes are exes for a reason, no matter what excuse u give.

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