I read this article the other day about women like Halle Berry and found it unfortunate that some people still find looking beautiful synonymous with being beautiful. I understand the misconception, but you only set yourself up for disappointment when your expectations of someone are based on what you’ve seen on Facebook, or what you’ve heard in the women’s restroom or mens locker room, instead of what you actually know.
Not only does this tarnish whatever preconceived notion of perfection you had of them, but can you imagine how they must feel? For those who are actually honest with themselves – IT’S A LOT FO FUCKING PRESSURE.
I know a girl who before I actually knew her, I knew of her. And for as long as I’ve known her, she always had a “the” before her name. I’m pretty sure every boy wanted to date her and most girls were either jealous or intimidated by her. I am not most girls. One day I met her and we became friends. Not girls, but friends. And what was NOT to like about her? She was gorgeous, nice, and had steez. But that was pretty much about it. I want to say the person lived up to “the” name, but there were so many other girls I found more intriguing.
And then, I met a man. A man who apparently had a reputation I was unaware of, most likely because I never cared about those types of things. He didn’t have a “the” before his name, but he did have a “fucking” in between it. We were acquaintances to say the least, but to every other girl – he was the man, the myth, the legend. Funny thing was, I didn’t fall in love with him until I realized he was a mess, a sham, and nothing like everyone else thought he was.
No one wants to admit their flaws, what more advertise it. But when a persons reputation (that may or may not be true) takes precedent over the actual person, it becomes unfortunate. It’s one thing to fall for the potential of a person, and another to fall for someone that doesn’t even exist. But then again, whose fault is that?
It’s fine for those of us who don’t care and just wanted another notch under our belts. And it’s inevitable and almost well deserved for those who are interested only in concepts and not actual characters. But for those of us who looked past the hearsay? Who asked instead of assumed? Who took the time to get to know the person behind the pretty face? It just makes it unfair.
Marilyn Monroe once said, “If you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.” Unfortunately, some of us are able to handle people’s worsts’ even when they can’t handle it themselves. And just to let you know, your truth and imperfections are even more beautiful than whatever anyone can hope you are. So let your reputation live up to YOU, not the other way around.