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The world is a crazy place, and the birth of the internet has only incubated the madness. Since the MTV series Catfish aired, I’ve been more than intrigued. The original movie is a documentary about Nev Schulman and his online relationship with a young woman named Megan who ends up not being who he expected, nor who she claimed to be. I recently caught an episode of Dr. Phil (for shame) that talked about online relationships gone wrong. I want to hug some of these victims as much as I want to hit them with a big, fat “Are you fucking stupid?!”

I can honestly say that I’ve met two complete strangers off the internet. One is my homegirl Em who I met when I was still in high school and am having lunch with tomorrow, and the other is my homie Gennaro who I unfortunately lost touch with throughout the years. In both cases I made awesome new friends, and I didn’t have to lie about anything. Back then my biggest annoyance was a slow dial-up connection. Nowadays, I have to worry about 46 year old women pretending to be 32 year old men and delusional schizophrenics.

I’ve had the pleasure of meeting a few of you amazing readers in the flesh at random events throughout the years, and by the time this gets published I will have met another one for coffee. But if it wasn’t for the fact that we shared a mutual friend, I definitely wouldn’t have been as willing to meet up. My friends know that I am the fucking QUEEN OF PARANOIA, and I wear my crown proud. But had I not lowered that crown just ever so slightly years back, I also would’ve never met one of my dearest friends here in New York.

All I’m saying is don’t be stupid i.e. meet someone at their or your house. Trust your instincts, and use common sense. If you have none, borrow some of Dr. Phil’s here. It’s one thing for a real person to break your heart, what more a fake one? Don’t fall for the bait. Catch perpetrators before you get reeled in and it’s too late.

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