I have way too may things to say about the latest chapter of Sex and the City aptly titled, And Just Like That. So many things that it provoked me into binge watching the entire SATC series from Season 1, Episode 1. "And just like that" I was reminded of how toxic Big and Carrie's relationship was. Susan Sharon reminded us all at Big's funeral when she whispered, "Am I the only one that remembers what a prick he was to her?" The answer is no Sharon, you're not. Despite it all, I still cried tears of joy when they got back together in the end of the first SATC movie and ugly Kim Kardashian cried tears of utter despair when he died in Carrie's arms at the end of the first AJLT episode (WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL 911 CARRIE, WHY???). I guess I, too was in the same toxic relationship with them.
"It got me thinking" was it all worth it in the end? The decade of manipulation, narcissism, cheating, and break-ups to make-ups? I think naive, 30-year old me believes so, but watching the entire show over again made me think otherwise. So just how long are you willing to endure the rain if you knew it ended in a rainbow?
What are you willing to sacrifice? What are you willing to tolerate? Is ten years of feeling insecure and not being a priority sprinkled in with some happy moments and good sex a fair price to pay to live the fairytale after? I used to compare my past relationships to Carrie and Big's and Carrie and Aiden's. Aiden was the guy you should be with and Big's saving grace was, "The heart wants what it wants". So does the heart want to break a few times for a long time before finally getting what you want? It's a BIG decision to make.